Declan Hercules & Keevah Nyx House: Keevah Nyx House: New Blogger!

Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.

-- Lao Tzu

My journey to life started 36 months ago—not the standard 9.

My parents desperately wanted a second child, but after the harrowing pregnancy, birth, 3-month neonatal intensive care stay, and multiple surgeries that my older brother, Hercules, had on his journey to life, Mother and Father were cautious. They did not want to repeat that experience.

After the birth of Hercules, they had to “push pause” for over three years while Declan learned to eat by mouth after having multiple abdominal surgeries. Additionally Mama studied and PASSED her board exams during this time. She couldn’t take the exams when she was supposed to 4 years ago because her intestine had ruptured while pregnant with Hercules 1 week before the exam. They could not risk this happening again, so they deferred a second child until the exams were safely behind her.

Being the scientists that they both are, they set out to explore what went wrong physically the first time and how to avoid it with a second pregnancy. First, Mama had surgery to remove a septum in her uterus to give another baby more room to grow. She also had at least 10 fluroscopic studies, MRIs, and CT scans...along with consultations with five different doctors and countless blood tests. When all those studies returned normal, only one major problem remained: Mama’s “incompetent cervix” which would not support a pregnancy. Pregnancy was going to be very risky; it was suggested that Mama and Dada investigate surrogacy and adoption. These options seemed both exciting and challenging, and they were explored in detail.

But, Mama was not ready to give-up on having the experience of a healthy pregnancy. So, she studied. At first, her research was discouraging - she would definitely be on bedrest for much of the pregnancy (much harder with Hercules at home), and have a very high chance of another premature birth. After more research, Mama found a doctor at the University of Chicago who performs an amazing (yet shockingly controversial) procedure called a Trans-Abdominal Cerclage (TAC). This procedure would bind her cervix at the top (instead of standard cerclages which suture the bottom), eliminating the need for bedrest and nearly eliminating the chance of preterm birth. After much deliberation, Mama and Dada decided to fly to Chicago to have the procedure performed in April 2014..

Mama shortly became pregnant, but their joy was short-lived when the pregnancy demised within eight weeks. Mama was shaken, but resilient and she soon became pregnant again.

This pregnancy appeared to be going well. The fetus was growing at the right pace and appeared to be developing properly. The TAC was doing its job and the first trimester flew by without incident. Mama and Dada were very happy.

They went to the doctor for a detailed anatomical scan of the fetus at 20-weeks in December 2014, and they were devastated to learn that the heart had not developed properly. This pregnancy was not going to be viable. Mama had a C-section, and she was no longer pregnant. Mama and Dada were devastated and despaired that they might not ever have their second baby.

The heart abnormality had some risk of recurrence, and Mama wasn’t getting any younger. To have the opportunity to screen the embryos for many genetic defects, and to hopefully freeze embryos if needed in the future, Mama and Dada decided to do a round of in vitro fertilization. IVF is invasive and expensive, but nonetheless, they gave it a try. Alas, luck was not on their side. Only one embryo grew properly; that embryo was implanted, but it failed to grow. Their first round of IVF had failed.

Mama and Dada decided to let some time pass before deciding what to do, and after reflection, they decided against another IVF attempt.

Low and behold, two months later, they were pregnant with me!

As you can imagine, Mama and Dada were gun-shy from their several failed pregnancies. So, they reserved their excitement and applied science with vigor. Indeed, I suspect that I am among the most scanned babies in history. Since Mama is a doctor, she has unusual access to ultrasound machines, and she made good use of those machines. Furthermore, from the very beginning, Mama’s doctors wanted to see Mama at least once every two weeks. I was being treated as an high risk pregnancy. I found this fuss a bit odd since I was confidently growing and developing just fine on my own.

Again, Mama’s TAC did its job and kept me comfortably in place. And, despite Mama’s vigilance and the near continuous monitoring of my progress, there was nothing to worry about. Mama spent these weeks decorating my nursery with a million tiny details. She also continued to work full time, including operating every week.

By week 20, I had been scanned about a half dozen times; nevertheless, Mama and Dada approached the 20-week Developmental Scan with dread. It was at this scan that they learned that my older brother was likely to be born very premature, and it was at this scan that they learned the previous pregnancy was not viable. So, they steeled themselves for the worst.

Their dread turned to joy as the scan progressed and the doctor pointed out all my key parts that were developing just perfectly. The high-risk obstetrician proclaimed I was a healthy baby! Mama and Dada were over-the-moon with glee.

My parents, however, had learned not to become complacent in their joy. Five weeks later, while undergoing another 3-D ultrasound, the doctor found “something that did not belong.” Those were the words that Mama and Dada had been terrified of hearing. They had discovered a congenital cystic adenomatoid malformation (CCAM) in my lung, and Mama and Dada felt like they had been hit by a train.

The fear was that fast growing CCAMs can actually impinge on the heart and on the lungs, but as long as the CCAM did not grow, I should be fine. So, Mama and Dada were forced to wait several weeks so that another measure could calibrate the growth rate. Once that measure had been made, they were relatively confident that my little CCAM was not much to worry about.

At this point, I was 29 weeks old--which incidentally was the gestational age at which my older brother, Hercules, was born. Mama’s permanent TAC would not allow her to have a standard birth. Rather, she would have a scheduled C-section. And, since she already had an incision in her uterus, the doctors wanted to be sure that I was born well before the onset of natural labor. So, it was decided that I would be born 1-month premature on December 20th.

Mama and Dada started to count down the days. The closer that we got to 12/20, the more real everything started to become. Mama worked until the week of my birth - even continuing to operate. Two days before I was to be born by C-Section, Mama, Dada, and Hercules went to their favorite restaurant in the Carneros countryside to have their final dinner as a family of 3. Being in the womb, I could tell it was a bitter-sweet event for them. The three of them had been through a lot together, and now their quest to grow their family appear to be on the verge of fruition.

On December 20th, Mama and Dada drove to the hospital early in the morning. At the hospital, the staff quickly readied Mama for surgery and took her to the operating room. Dada was then invited to join after they stabilised her anesthesia. It turned out that while Mama was being anesthetized, her blood pressure dropped to a frightfully low value (though just briefly!). Luckily Dada was not in the room for that bit of excitement!

The procedure went smoothly, and I was born at 8:38am on 12/20. I was a dainty 5lbs1oz, and 18 inches long. I had to spend one day in the NICU since I was a bit early, but that was 99 days less than my big brother. Really, I wanted to give the family a chance to reconnect with old friends from the NICU staff! My lungs worked great - and the doctors were so unimpressed with the CCAM that I don’t need any follow up.

Mama and Dada named me Keevah Nyx House.

Like my older brother, Declan Hercules, Mama and Dada gave me a Gaelic first name and a Greek middle name.

I was named Nyx for the primordial Goddess who was born of Chaos. Like my namesake, Chaos surrounded the universe of my conception. Mama and Dada had three failed and painful attempts before me. In some ways, I carry those wounds.

But, Nyx is also the Goddess of Night and the Mother of Dawn and Brightness. Mother and father named me for the mystery and charm of night, as well as the hope that comes with every dawn. Fittingly, I was born on the eve of the Winter Solstice, when night is at its apex and when the days are beginning to get brighter.

It would have been much easier if Mama could have gotten pregnant on the first try and without the TAC procedure or the septum removal. But, journeys seldom follow a simple path, and the scars that one carries from life’s unplanned events form the tapestry of our existence.

My challenging journey to life is both my foundation and my quilt, and like my brother’s before me, it is now a part of our fabric; the journey expanded our family from three to four members. And, it made me into the Goddesses of Night and the Mother of Dawn.